Willie Rimes Gets Married
Willie Rimes fled to London, of the guards he was afraid He might we arrested after his antics at the St Patricks …
Some House Party In Heaven
They are having some house party in Heaven All of the greats they were playing The Devil enjoyed the music drifting through …
The Great Mcgonagall
William “Topaz” Mc Gonnagle was poet from Dundee, who discovered he could make a rhyme at the grand old age of 52 …
Willie Rimes and the Crock of Gold
The morning after St Patricks Day the bould Willie awoke, “Jesus Mary and Joseph” where the first words he spoke, All thoughts …
Willie Rimes and the Saint Patrick’s Day Parade
Willie Rimes was drinking the health of Saint Patrick And a show of himself he made When he decided to become the …
Willie Rimes and the Masons Goat
Like many good men before him To join the local lodge our Willie did inquire The mystery of the rituals and the …
Snakes Defense to the Charges About the Garden of Eden
My dad used to wind up preachers from the Jehovahs Witnesses by denying the Eden story, and using the last line of …
Wake at Birr
The true and humorous tale, though shocking at the time, of the fiasco of my mothers coffin, at her wake in Birr… …
Jolly Freemasons Clarifications of Confusions
A humerus explanation of masonry, of which I am a member, which in typical Carty fashion causes more confusion than clarification! There …
Dutch Courage
All possibilities will reveal Themselves in the morning, waking Some will smile and what they find in bed Others in horror will …
The Priest and the Playboy Magazine
In the clerics car, which the housekeeper was cleaning, A copy of Playboy was found, She assumed it was planted there by …
A Future Vision When No Future We See
The Old Folks parties will be great craic when we are of age!!! Geriatric ravers… what can possibly go wrong? A youth, …
Cupid the Hitman
There’s a little fella flying, He’s appearing here and there, Striking victims at random, He can appear anywhere! The police put out …
The Pearly Gates
I I was talking to a widow And she was telling the tale to me About one night in the moonlight Her …
Tomcats Chasing Pussies
Tomcats are chasing pussys and they howling at the sky But the pussy cats having none of it, his loving she’ll deny …
The Sleeping Sentry
The dog sleeping on the doorstep Keeps the cats away For they cant enter while hes there And upon the couches play. …
I Wish Cows Would Say Hello, And Dogs Quiet Would Keep
While walking to Arvagh today, a cow jumped up and bolted in a field next to me and put the heart crossways …
Willie Rimes Goes to Belfast to Protest at the Parades
Willie Rimes is just back from Belfast, his eyes both black and blue His nose is broken, the whites of his eyes …
Aliens in Edenderry
” “Look at them bloody immigrants In their fancy fuck off UFO Paid for with a grant from the government Just like …
Moo Said the Cow – the strange tale of a hitching cow, a helpful driver and a baffled traffic Garda
The cow on the roadside was hitching, The driver that stopped didnt know what to do, He spoke slowly, asked the cow …