Santa’s sleigh got taken down by a windmill
Flying out near Daingean Christmas Eve
He was drunk after drinking all the brandy
The reindeer were on elf navigation I do believe.
Santa does Ireland last as we are his favourite
So touring around he takes his time
To avoid the Guardai and the Irish Avaition Authority
As drinking and flying is a crime.
He was after costing over Croghan Hill
As a stedy descent while asleep he made
The reindeer never copped until it was too late
Between the legs poor Rudolph got a blade.
He will now be known as Rudolpha
Into the dark the sleigh disappeared
When dawn came out the carnage it was woeful
As sleigh and reindeer crashed they there appeared!
Well the locals had a great time with the booty
For the kids from Derry to Donegal
From Belfast to Belturbet they got nothing
The North Offaly posse took it all!
Not even the bad children got coal
The last few sacks of that was lifted too
No Nintendos for Newry or Lego for the kids of Longford
What could poor old Santa do?
He was thrown clear of the blades by a whisker
He ended up hanging down by the reins
Prancer was wrapped up in a Pylon
Scattered all around was the sleigh loads remains!
Someone came across them and chased away the looters
(Though its said he grabbed for himself a DJI fancy drone)
He said help, and give him a minute
Hed call for help from a lost Iphone.
The woman answered in the Emergency Control Room
“Excuse me?” says she, “what you said I missed”
She refused to send out the fire brigade the cops and ambulance
As she said that Santa did not exist!
Now Santa got away from it I do not know
Why did he not see the red flashing beacons no one can tell
But next year should he dare fly around this area…
He will avoid the bloody windfarms like hell!