{"id":541,"date":"2013-11-10T02:48:51","date_gmt":"2013-11-10T02:48:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/?p=541"},"modified":"2014-09-10T02:50:51","modified_gmt":"2014-09-10T02:50:51","slug":"i-blame-it-all-on-tesco","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/i-blame-it-all-on-tesco\/","title":{"rendered":"I Blame It All On TESCO"},"content":{"rendered":"
(or how men lost their status in relationships)<\/address>\n

When dinosaurs walked tall on earth,
\nAnd Tesco was yet to be\u2026
\nWomen who wanted meat and shit
\nRelied on chaps like me\u2026
\nWe gathered up our clubs and spears,
\nAnd risked our very lives,
\nTo bring back meat and furry skins
\nSo as to get some loving from our wives\u2026<\/p>\n

But then, some bollix invented Tesco,
\nAnd the Dino\u2019s all died out,
\nAnd things got tough the the Land of Love
\nThere was too much competition about.
\nNow they want us \u201csensitive\u201d
\nYet not be a sissy at all,
\nWe have to love our mammy\u2019s,
\nYet if we do, mammy\u2019s boys us they call\u2026<\/p>\n

Its a hard life being a fella,
\nThings were so simple before,
\nAll you risked was your life, and not your pride\u2026
\nIts not like that anymore\u2026
\nWe risk more than our lives, our very EGO\u2026
\nWhich they love to dent and bruise\u2026
\nAnd I blame it all on Tesco\u2026
\nThe War of the Sexes us fellas did lose\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(or how men lost their status in relationships) When dinosaurs walked tall on earth, And Tesco was yet to be\u2026 Women who wanted meat and shit Relied on chaps like me\u2026 We gathered up our clubs and spears, And risked our very lives, To bring back meat and furry skins …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[89],"tags":[796,797,795],"class_list":["post-541","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-poems","tag-battle-of-the-sexes","tag-funny-poems-2","tag-men-and-women","column","twocol"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7EI4f-8J","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4892,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/turkeys-ghost-returns-to-ruin-christmas-dinner\/","url_meta":{"origin":541,"position":0},"title":"Turkeys Ghost Returns to Ruin Christmas Dinner","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"24th December 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"All was set for the Christmas The tinsel glistened on the tree, The star wasn't even crooked As in other years all too often it would be... 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Dunkirk saw the flames and heard the screams Not since Moses parted the Red Sea So the Israelite's could escape from the Egyptians Such a miracle\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "The Great War"","block_context":{"text":"The Great War","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/war-poetry\/the-great-war\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Little Boats that sailed the chanell during the evacuation of Dunkirk faced down the odds. Itwas a miracle the operation succeeded. One of those rescued was my granduncle Tom Reilly, who lost his legs and arms in the fighting before dying in military hospital in 1953","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/tomreilly.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/tomreilly.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/tomreilly.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1115,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/why-is-she-on-my-mind\/","url_meta":{"origin":541,"position":2},"title":"Why Is She On My Mind?","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"27th June 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Why she is on my mind Who lives so far away I to forget her a way cannot find, As I think of her today And that is love, in one of its guises, Forgetfulness has many disguises But why should I who her so much loved Seek her memory\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Sweetest Smile Poems"","block_context":{"text":"Sweetest Smile Poems","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/love-poems\/sweetest-smile-poems\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1777,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/men-in-the-company-of-women-valentines-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":541,"position":3},"title":"Men in the Company of Women – Valentines Day","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"13th February 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 \"Men in the Company of Women\" is a men's anthology of love poetry written for the women in their lives, or who have shaped and affected mens lives in some fashion. 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