{"id":4936,"date":"2021-02-15T06:58:02","date_gmt":"2021-02-15T06:58:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/?p=4936"},"modified":"2021-02-15T07:01:38","modified_gmt":"2021-02-15T07:01:38","slug":"willie-rimes-breaks-covid-lockdown","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-breaks-covid-lockdown\/","title":{"rendered":"Willie Rimes breaks COVID Lockdown"},"content":{"rendered":"

A month or so into lockdown, Willie Rimes was finding it hard
\nAll the pubs were shut, nothing to do
\nOutside the 5Km zone but within his price range
\nWas a house of ill repute that Willie knew
\nSick of the off licence he was nearly off the drink
\n– The only time he’s more of a danger than when drunk –
\nThe notes were rustling in his trousers as unspent money is known to do
\nFor anyone living now like Willie like a monk!<\/p>\n

\"Garda<\/a>
Garda car at checkpoint<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So Willie hopped into his jalopy, no insurance or NCT
\nHe figured out he was no worse in that regard than most
\nAnd is a quizzing copper on the roadside should chance to be:
\n“Sure the tax disc Garda me aul flower is in the post!”
\nHe was never comfortable driving when he hadnt a drink or two
\nFound it unnerving how others refused to share their side of the road
\nThey expecting him – shock horror – to stay in his own lane:
\nHow the law of the land curtails freedom this clearly to Willie showed!<\/p>\n

He got out to the outskirts and coming to a bridge
\nThere was a cop car pulled in up to the right
\nOn the left a Garda stood, and as quick as Willie could
\nHe spun the car around and out of sight.
\nIt wasnt very long until the blue light showed up behind
\nAnd Willie found himself cought in a cul de sac
\nHe couldnt go forward – what a place to put a wall –
\nThe police were unhelpful in allowing him to go back.<\/p>\n

“Why did you turn from the checkpoint, hi?”, said the garda with a smile
\nShe had the blondest hair and eyes that in Willies heart lit fires!
\n“I wasn’t trying to get out of my 5K zone” said Willie with a stammer
\n“I jut didn’t want ye seeing my bald tyres!”
\nShe booked him for the tyres, took the car for having no tax
\nShe made the bould Willie walk the 4km all the way back home,
\nWhen he asked her for her number all she sai was “999”
\nAnd told him to beat it back the way he had come!<\/p>\n

Yes, these lockdowns they are hard, between the lawyers and the fines
\nThe money Willie had for the ladies of ill repute was all but gone…
\nThey took away the driving license that Willie never had had
\nThey crushed his love machine in the scrapyard – his driving days for now done.
\nIts a good thing the Garda and judge didnt know where Willie was really headed:
\nAll excited for an hour to have with him a match
\nIt would be an hour of fun, and then he would be gone:
\nHe’d be happy if COVID19 was all that there he did catch!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A month or so into lockdown, Willie Rimes was finding it hard All the pubs were shut, nothing to do Outside the 5Km zone but within his price range Was a house of ill repute that Willie knew Sick of the off licence he was nearly off the drink – …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[376,2716],"tags":[4400,4278,318],"class_list":["post-4936","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-poems-18","category-life-and-times-of-willie-rimes","tag-covid-lockdown","tag-covid19","tag-willie-rimes","column","twocol"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7EI4f-1hC","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2360,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-at-the-quare-horse-fair\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":0},"title":"Willie Rimes At the Quare Horse Fair","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"12th October 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"We think there was one lawbreaker at the 2015 Banagher Horse Fair.. of course it would have to be that pal of our Cartys, the bould Willie Rhymes... the never seen member of the Tullamore Rhymers Club... awful troublemaker that lad! The 2016 Banagher Horse Fair is on September 18th!\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Banagher"","block_context":{"text":"Banagher","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/banagher\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Banagher Horse Fair - early in the morning of the 2015 Horse Fair","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/Banagher-Horse-Fair-early-in-the-morning-of-the-2015-Horse-Fair.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/Banagher-Horse-Fair-early-in-the-morning-of-the-2015-Horse-Fair.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/Banagher-Horse-Fair-early-in-the-morning-of-the-2015-Horse-Fair.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/Banagher-Horse-Fair-early-in-the-morning-of-the-2015-Horse-Fair.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4446,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-goes-to-confession\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":1},"title":"Willie Rimes Goes to Confession","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"2nd February 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 A legend in his own lifetime Afraid he'd go to hell The bold Willie went in to the church All his sins to the priest to tell The priest thought he had heard it all That he did by then you'd think: Its said after hearing Willies confession The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Funny Poems"","block_context":{"text":"Funny Poems","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/funny-poems\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Willie Rimes went to confession - that wasnt going to end well...","src":"https:\/\/upload.wikimedia.org\/wikipedia\/commons\/thumb\/a\/ab\/St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg\/647px-St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/upload.wikimedia.org\/wikipedia\/commons\/thumb\/a\/ab\/St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg\/647px-St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg 1x, https:\/\/upload.wikimedia.org\/wikipedia\/commons\/thumb\/a\/ab\/St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg\/647px-St.leonhard-ffm-beichtstuhl001.jpg 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3672,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-was-off-the-drink-for-lent\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":2},"title":"Willie Rimes Was Off the Drink For Lent","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"16th April 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Willie Rimes gave up the drink Not forever as one would think But before in disbelief you blink It was only for Lent Sure he broke out St Patricks Day But sure every Irishman does Lent that way Sure whats one day as he himself did say As to the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Funny Poems"","block_context":{"text":"Funny Poems","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/funny-poems\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Willie Rimes wakes up beside the Easter Bunny","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/04\/Willie-Rimes-wakes-up-beside-the-Easter-Bunny.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/04\/Willie-Rimes-wakes-up-beside-the-Easter-Bunny.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/04\/Willie-Rimes-wakes-up-beside-the-Easter-Bunny.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4413,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-builds-a-boat\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":3},"title":"Willie Rimes Builds a Boat","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"28th October 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"We havnt heard from Willie Rimes in a while... as expected, he has been up to no good... in a self built boat! What POSSIBLY could go wrong?","rel":"","context":"In "Funny Poems (18+!!!)"","block_context":{"text":"Funny Poems (18+!!!)","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/funny-poems-18\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/Lough-Derg.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/Lough-Derg.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/Lough-Derg.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/Lough-Derg.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3295,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-applies-to-be-santa-claus\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":4},"title":"Willie Rimes Applies to Be Santa Claus","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"29th November 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Santa is real, as well known by all girls and boys Comes every Christmas to good children and give to them their toys But he needs helpers every Christmas to meet and greet as him Willie Rimes applied this year upon a drunken whim! He got a phonecall for an\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Funny Poems"","block_context":{"text":"Funny Poems","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/funny-poems\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Some claim this is authentic footage of Willie Rimes dressed as Santa... I am not so sure!!!","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/Willie-Rimes-As-Santa.gif?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3042,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/willie-rimes-gone-on-the-run-at-the-galway-races\/","url_meta":{"origin":4936,"position":5},"title":"Willie Rimes Gone on the Run at the Galway Races","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"25th July 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Willie Rimes is back in town In Galway of all places The guards are still looking out for him Hes up at the bloody races He got in with some Americans Who liked his Galway drawl Though our Willie is a kind of droll And not from Galway at all!\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Funny Poems"","block_context":{"text":"Funny Poems","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/funny-poems\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Willie Rimes is on the run after giving dodgy tips that actually won at the Galway Races","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Willie-Rimes-is-on-the-run-after-giving-dodgy-tips-that-actually-won-at-the-Galway-Races.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Willie-Rimes-is-on-the-run-after-giving-dodgy-tips-that-actually-won-at-the-Galway-Races.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Willie-Rimes-is-on-the-run-after-giving-dodgy-tips-that-actually-won-at-the-Galway-Races.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Willie-Rimes-is-on-the-run-after-giving-dodgy-tips-that-actually-won-at-the-Galway-Races.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4936","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4936"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4936\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4941,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4936\/revisions\/4941"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4936"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4936"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4936"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}