{"id":4230,"date":"2017-12-23T11:55:43","date_gmt":"2017-12-23T11:55:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/?p=4230"},"modified":"2017-12-23T11:55:43","modified_gmt":"2017-12-23T11:55:43","slug":"santas-sleigh-got-taken-down-by-a-windmill","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/santas-sleigh-got-taken-down-by-a-windmill\/","title":{"rendered":"Santa’s Sleigh Got Taken Down By A Windmill"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Santa<\/a>
Santa Crashing At Daingean<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Santa’s sleigh got taken down by a windmill
\nFlying out near Daingean Christmas Eve
\nHe was drunk after drinking all the brandy
\nThe reindeer were on elf navigation I do believe.<\/p>\n

Santa does Ireland last as we are his favourite
\nSo touring around he takes his time
\nTo avoid the Guardai and the Irish Avaition Authority
\nAs drinking and flying is a crime.<\/p>\n

He was after costing over Croghan Hill
\nAs a stedy descent while asleep he made
\nThe reindeer never copped until it was too late
\nBetween the legs poor Rudolph got a blade.<\/p>\n

He will now be known as Rudolpha
\nInto the dark the sleigh disappeared
\nWhen dawn came out the carnage it was woeful
\nAs sleigh and reindeer crashed they there appeared!<\/p>\n

Well the locals had a great time with the booty
\nFor the kids from Derry to Donegal
\nFrom Belfast to Belturbet they got nothing
\nThe North Offaly posse took it all!<\/p>\n

Not even the bad children got coal
\nThe last few sacks of that was lifted too
\nNo Nintendos for Newry or Lego for the kids of Longford
\nWhat could poor old Santa do?<\/p>\n

He was thrown clear of the blades by a whisker
\nHe ended up hanging down by the reins
\nPrancer was wrapped up in a Pylon
\nScattered all around was the sleigh loads remains!<\/p>\n

Someone came across them and chased away the looters
\n(Though its said he grabbed for himself a DJI fancy drone)
\nHe said help, and give him a minute
\nHed call for help from a lost Iphone.<\/p>\n

The woman answered in the Emergency Control Room
\n“Excuse me?” says she, “what you said I missed”
\nShe refused to send out the fire brigade the cops and ambulance
\nAs she said that Santa did not exist!<\/p>\n

Now Santa got away from it I do not know
\nWhy did he not see the red flashing beacons no one can tell
\nBut next year should he dare fly around this area…
\nHe will avoid the bloody windfarms like hell!<\/p>\n

\"Windfarm<\/a>
Windfarm in Daingean<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Santa’s sleigh got taken down by a windmill Flying out near Daingean Christmas Eve He was drunk after drinking all the brandy The reindeer were on elf navigation I do believe. Santa does Ireland last as we are his favourite So touring around he takes his time To avoid the …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[361,109,89,4060],"tags":[4062,4063,377,4061,918,572,383,2612],"class_list":["post-4230","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-christmas-poetry","category-environment","category-funny-poems","category-wind-turbines","tag-daingean","tag-dangers-of-wind-farms","tag-funny-christmas-poem","tag-hazards-of-wind-turbines","tag-offaly","tag-santa-claus","tag-santy","tag-windfarm","column","twocol"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7EI4f-16e","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":903,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/christmas-eve-at-the-hospital\/","url_meta":{"origin":4230,"position":0},"title":"Christmas Eve at the Hospital","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"24th December 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Everybody was getting drowsy, drinking coffee to keep awake, Planning to get kebabs and chips, eating biscuits to beat the band, Idly scanning the CCTV when all of a sudden a shape was seen... It looked like reindeer and a sleigh, with a waving hand... There was no Garda helicopter,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Folklore and Legend"","block_context":{"text":"Folklore and Legend","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/folklore-and-legend\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Santa seen in Tullamore","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-in-Tullamore.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-in-Tullamore.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-in-Tullamore.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-in-Tullamore.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-in-Tullamore.jpg?resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":238,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/santa-xxx\/","url_meta":{"origin":4230,"position":1},"title":"Santa XXX","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"3rd December 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Santy is an unknown casanova... An intercontinental romantic supernova, He gets to play away Once a year for a day... Behind the back of unsuspecting Mrs Clausova!!! He sneaks into womens homes a night, Silent so as not to cause fright, By the way to girls and boys, Who have\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Christmas Poetry"","block_context":{"text":"Christmas Poetry","link":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/category\/christmas-poetry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-and-his-Women.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-and-his-Women.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-and-his-Women.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.writingsinrhyme.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Santa-and-his-Women.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1318,"url":"https:\/\/writingsinrhyme.com\/index.php\/santys-christmas-party\/","url_meta":{"origin":4230,"position":2},"title":"Santy’s Christmas Party","author":"Tom\u00e1s \u00d3 C\u00e1rthaigh","date":"5th December 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"They had finished all the presents, cleared off all the shelves Wrapped up all the chocolates, Santa and the Elves Someone brought out the bubbly, Mrs Claus opened the wine: It was the North Poles Christmas Party - all were set for a good time! 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Bildoar over at the Jesters Castel at Disqus , who recently passed away. He was a big fan of Willie and his antics, his last comment on my pieces making reference to the infamous Russian Valentine our hero got mixed up with!!! 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